Fresh Ideas

There are quite a few around-the-house projects for the summer, but not a lot that I can do myself. For example, the railings leading to our front door are rusted through, but I can't replace them myself.

Nonetheless, the hapless Bob Villa inside me is itching for a job.  It needs to be moderate in scale (one or two weekends) and low cost (since we're paying pros for other jobs).  Maybe its my new found cooking hobby, maybe its an homage to our grandparents, or maybe its my anger at food prices - have you noticed the price of grapes skyrocketing? - but whatever the reason I want to build a vegetable garden.

There are a couple of challenges with this.  First and foremost, I don't have executive management's sign-off on the project yet.  Melissa has half-heartedly given her agreement to the concept, but I thinks its primarily because she doesn't think I'll actually do it.  We'll see once push comes to shove.

Next, I don't have a great location.  Our backyard is full of trees, preventing a lot of light from reaching the ground.  A garden without light doesn't stand much chance. There's one area of the back fourty (feet) that gets some light but I'd have to remove a lilac bush and one of those yellow bushes that covers 72% of the New Jersey landscapes.

Side note - as I'm writing this an ad for Ace Hardware just came over the radio.  It started with an "Average Joe Homeowner" type stating "I will not start a project this spring... that I finish next spring."  An omen?

Another option is the side of the house.  There's a stretch of very fertile ground over there. The two problems there are a) it would have to be a very long and narrow garden, maybe looking a little funny, and b) there's a rabbit family that I'd either be displacing or providing a season long salad bar.

We'll see what comes of my dream for fresh picked peppers and tomatoes.  But one thing is for sure, after all the snow and rain we've had over the past few months I'm ready to get out into the sun and do SOMEthing.

Stepping Outside the Recipe Book

Breakfast menu planning isn't easy.  Not when you're trying to do it every week.  Though a Google search of "breakfast recipes" returns approximately 39,800,000 results, I'm willing to bet that 38,842,307 of them are either pancakes, waffles, french toast, omlettes, stratta, or fried or poached eggs.  So keeping it fresh week in and week out is tough.

To make it even more limiting, Melissa has been on a carbohydrates kick.  She's not on a high carb diet or anything, she's just really into grains and bread right now.  So it was time to get a little creative.

I'm not at the point where I'm completely making up my own recipes, but I'm getting better at adapting and modifying recipes for other purposes.  For example, this month's issue of Bon Appetit had a recipes for "Pop-Tarts."  That sounded like an ideal appetizer, but seemed like an awful amount of work for a first course.  So I thought I could simplify it a little bit using phyllo dough.  I laid out five sheets of phillo with a little butter and very slight dusting of cinnamon sugar between each.  To that base I added a thin layer of strawberry preserves, then covered with another five sheets of phillo/butter/cinnamon sugar and baked at 350 degrees F for about 18 minutes.

These sounded pretty good to me, but I thought they would need a little something extra.  What, I wasn't sure.  So when in doubt, make extra.  Separately, I made batches of caramel whipped cream, and a blueberry jam-like thing by adding about two teaspoons of corn starch to this pancake syrup recipe and cooking the hell out of it.  It was finished with some sliced fresh strawberries on top and although I screwed up the plating (should have cut the squares first, then added a dollop of topping to each instead of slathering them on each half like cake icing), they were pretty tasty and a definite keeper.

For the main course, I planned waffles but wanted to do something different with them.  Since I wasn't confident enough to change the whole wheat waffle recipe, I had to get creative with the toppings.  Berries, maple syrup, confectioners' sugar... they're all pretty standard.  But you never really hear about orange and waffles.  So I boiled about three cups of o.j. with a little cinnamon, brown sugar and corn starch until it was thickened.  To add some texture, I caramelized and chopped bananas in the same syrup (sans corn starch), then drizzled both over the waffles.

While Melissa was jonesing for her carbs, I had a hankering for some eggs.  So to work eggs into the menu I made the egg muffins I had tried once before.  Melissa's not a huge fan, but I think they're absolutely delicious.  And while at the butcher yesterday I picked up some canadian bacon which I lightly fried.  No, it didn't really fit with the rest of the menu, but it looked good in the store and tasted good in my mouth.

From top to bottom, this was a four star meal, but the potential that it yields is worth five.  I took a few chances today and though not perfect, their success has definitely given me the confidence to step outside of the recipe book a little more in the future.

Bracket Busting Bonanza

Despite last night's return (mostly) to sanity, this has been one of the most exciting, head scratch inducing NCAA Tournaments in recent memory.  And the 2010 ITWOP Bracket Challenge tournament has been just as confounding.  For example, consider that the competitors have on average less than two Final Four picks left.  Or that Contrarian JD, who I previously made fun of for not picking a champion, is essentially in the same place as 76% of the other players who's champion pick already lost.  But at least one thing is playing out true to form - Mike is has the lowest winning percentage, coming in at 46%, and is tied with your humble narrator for last place.

Who's sitting on the other side of the standings?  Like last year, it's not necessarily who you'd think.

• Brutus Buckeye, who in a tweet admitted to not knowing anything about college basketball, is at the top of the pile right now.  
• But Caden and Fatten Island are nipping at his heels.  
• Fatten Island looks like the overall favorite right now as far as potential points (his stint on Tobacco Road must have paid off).  
• Though Himom's bid to repeat seems to be dashed, but P/P is still fighting to keep the trophy at home, sitting in fifth place.  

But the Cinderella story of the 2010 ITWOP Bracket Challenge has got to be Jupiter Ann.  Jupiter Ann, who finished dead last in 2009, with what had to be considered a truly embarrassing performance (sorry Ann) is rebounding strong this year.  She's sitting in fourth place.  Although she'll probably need Kentucky to lose at some point is she wants a shot at the title, sh still has three Final Four picks still alive and is poised for a top five finish.

As the games unfold this weekend, the ITWOP Bracket Challenge will become more clear as well.  Stay tuned for more Madness!

Rank Bracket Pts Possible Pts
1 Bucks FTW!  60 92
2 Fatten Island 58 130
2 Caden 58 90
4 Jupiter Ann 57 97
4 P/P         57 89
6 For FIL 56 128
6 Coach K 56 112
6 Mouse Rat                56 88
9 For MIL 55 119
10 Vinny's Corn 54 94
10 JD's Bracket 54 94
10 Cousin John 54 86
10 Pocono JD                54 86
14 LAB         51 115
15 Mrs. ITWOP 49 89
15 casey 49 81
15 Jessie James 49 73
18 Wife of Brutus
        Buckeye                 46 70
19 Himom 44 76
20 For RoRo         41 41
21 First Week Champs 39 63
21 ITWOP 4 EV-A       39 63

“I like it, this scenario, because people don’t have to vote on the Senate bill.”

In they Gettysburg Address, Abraham Lincoln promised a government "of they people, by the people, and for the people."  "Of the people" broke down decades ago - officials on both sides of the aisle are too far removed from you and me to ever consider themselves one of the people.  And now, if the leaders in the House of Representatives have their way, you can kiss "by the people" goodbye as well.

This is not about the health care reform bill. We already know that more Americans are against the bill than supporting it, and opposition continues to grow.  No, this post is about how the House Democrats plan to pass the health care reform bill.  I introduce to you The Slaughter Rule.

The Slaughter Rule is so named for House Rules Committee Chairperson Louise Slaughter, though in an ironic twist it could have earned that name just as easily for what its doing to the Constitution or your voice in your government.

Here's how it works:  a rule is proposed by the House.  The rule can be a simple modification or amendment to another bill.  If the rule is written in a certain way so as to include the rest of the original bill, when the House votes to approve the first bill it is also "deeming" the original bill approved without actually voting on the original bill.  It can then be sent to the President to sign into law.


Here's how it's being employed with health care:  Article 1 Section 7 of the Constitution required that both Houses of Congress pass the same bill before sending it to the President.  It also states that the votes of both Houses shall be determined by Yeas and Nays.  In this case, a) both Houses are not voting on the same bill, and b) forget about the same bill, the House of Representatives aren't even voting on the bill.  Why?  Simply because the Representatives would be able to pass the bill without having their name attached to an actual vote on the bill.  They're able to tow the party line even though they know the bill is so unpopular with the public that they want plausible deniablity later on.

Confused?  Yeah, it's ridiculous.  But it shows how our government works.  The best explanation I could found is from Director of the Stanford Constitutional Law Center at Stanford Law School and former-federal judge Michael McConnell courtesy of Heritage.org. Bottom line is that the rule essentially bypasses your voice (via your elected representatives) by skirting the Constitution.

This rule has been around since the 1930s and used with increasing frequency, with people from parties questioning the legality of it.  But never has it been used to pass legislation as significant as this.  If put into force, this will certainly be challenged in court and, if you read the Constitution, will almost certainly be defeated.

Despite the near certain judicial defeat, the House of Representative's Democrats are considering using this underhanded tactic, showing the incredible disregard they have for you and for the Constitution.  Its actions such as these that are feeding the Conservative movement rising in America.  I don't consider myself a Conservative - there are far too many positions I disagree with.  But what I do agree with Conservatives on is the need to uphold the Constitution.

In 1994's With Honors, Joe Pesci made an impassioned speech in defense of the constitution.  He says

The beauty of the Constitution is that it can always be changed. The beauty of the Constitution is that it makes no set law other than faith in the wisdom of ordinary people to govern themselves... Our "founding parents" were pompous, white, middle-aged farmers, but they were also great men. Because they knew one thing that all great men should know: that they didn't know everything. Sure, they'd make mistakes, but they made sure to leave a way to correct them. The president is not an "elected king," no matter how many bombs he can drop. Because the "crude" Constitution doesn't trust him. He's just a bum, okay Mr. Pitkannan? He's just a bum.

The United States Constitution is widely regarded as the most important piece of governmental literature ever written for exactly that reason - it allows for change.  But it also stipulates in great detail the process by which it should be changed.  In my opinion, deliberately circumventing this process when 17% of our national economy and and saddling future generations is at stake should be considered treason.

Before you step into the voting booth this November, please come back and re-read this post.  I don't care if you support the health care reform or not - just read this and think about whether or not your representatives are actually representing you.  You have a voice.  Use it!

And by the way, in case you think that this is a bunch of right-wing conspiracy theory, the title of this post is a direct quote from House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

Let the Games Begin

The NCAA Tournament games have tipped off which means the 2010 ITWOP Bracket Challenge is in full swing!

The pool is quite deep this year.  We have almost all of last year's players returning as well as newcomers RoRo, Big Vin, FIL, MIL, K and DynaMac. Our 22 players makes for the largest ITWOP Challenge of any type to date.

And as if a personalized, one of a kind ITWOP T-shirt weren't enough of a reward, there's an additional symbol of the champion's hard fought victory I didn't publicize last year - the ITWOP Bracket Challenge Trophy!  Like the Stanley Cup, this trophy will be emblazoned with the winner's name and held in his possession until he relinquishes the crown in a future Bracket Challenge. Himom proudly displayed it in her foyer for all visitors to awe at as they entered her house. Future winners will undoubtedly display it with the same pride.  Pictures will follow later.

Nothing is won or lost on the first day, but there were still a few notable turns of events:

Himom and P/P seem determined to keep the trophy in their house.  Last year's first and second place finishers are starting off 2010 tied with Caden and Fatten Island for first place with 12 out of 16 correct picks.

Jupiter Ann and Brutus Buckeye must have been feeling the sting of their 2009 bottom of the barrel finishes while making this year's picks. Had they gone with their hearts like they did last year, they would have looked like geniuses picking hometown Ohio to beat Georgetown.  

Day One was as rough on RoRo as it was for the Big East overall as she lost her champion pick Marquette.

We have three JDs in the Challenge this year: Pocono JD, Cousin John (also known as Cousin JD) and just plain JD.

We're going to call that last one Contrarian JD, and not only because he went out on a limb by picking Michigan St vs Purdue in the championship game. He made the unpresidented decision that there would be no winner of the championship game!  "That's a bold strategy, Cotton. Lets see if it pays off for 'em."

Mike is failing to leave up to his bracket's name of "First Week Champs", sitting in sole possession of last place with only seven of sixteen correct picks.

2010 ITWOP Bracket Challenge is Open

The challenge is open... and closing fast. The games start tomorrow so visit http://y.ahoo.it/AqRQUo9y now and sign up TODAY!!!

This is a public league so invite your friends and enemies.

Also, this year I've allowed more than one bracket per player with the intent of allowing us to help the lesa tech savvy among us. Enter your own bracket and then enter one for someone that doesn't have a Yahoo account.

Email me at Joe@ithinkweoverpacked.com with any questions.

Fast Break Breakfast

Today is not just any SSSS. No sir, today is an S-5: Surprise Selection Sunday Sunrise Sustenance.  Yep, it's Selection Sunday which means today is also the kickoff for the 2nd Annual ITWOP Bracket Challenge.  More on that later, first the food.

My plans took a last minute turn yesterday when I learned that figs aren't in season (can't they be imported from South America like every other fruit in the winter?).  But the menu's dramatic turn was also an opportunity to tie it into the Bracket Challenge. Here's what I decided to serve.

Big Ten Tropical Fruit Salad:  For those of you who don't follow collegiate sports, the name "Big Ten Conference" is a fallacy.  There are actually eleven teams in the conference.  And so I made a fruit salad with:

1. mango
2. banana
3. papaya
4. grapes
5. strawberries
6. kiwi
7. mandarin oranges
8. pineapple
9. and a honey
10. + lime juice
11. + ginger dressing

Hardwood Toast with Berry Madness:  Most french toast yield bread that's a little soft on the outside from the egg mixture.  So based on a recommendation from P/P (who's also experimenting in the kitchen a bit) and Himom (last year's Bracket Challenge champion) I went for a corn flake and almond crusted french toast to more closely resemble the gleaming maple boards of Cameron Indoor Stadium.  And fresh squeezed orange juice (used in lieu of the liqueur) gave the berries a different flavor and made them more interesting to eat on the french toast without any syrup.

Magic Mushrooms in a Bird's Nest: There's nothing magic - or otherwise funny - about the wood-ear mushrooms I used in place of chanterelles in this culinary send up to one of the most discussed games in NCAA history, the 1979 championship game featuring two men destined to change the sport.  

Now on to the tourney.  If you took part last year, I hope you come back.  If you didn't play last year, there's no better time to join that now.  You don't need to be a college basketball expert.  On the contrary, based on the top few results from last year it's better if you're not!  

The teams and seeds will be set by 7:00pm EST tonight and the games start on Tuesday afternoon.  To join, simply visit http://y.ahoo.it/AqRQUo9y and log in to your Yahoo! account (required, but free).  It's a public league so invite your friends, neighbors, spouses, kids, and anyone else you want to beat and public mock.  Remember, you can sign up now and then need to make your picks between 7pm tonight and Tuesday morning.

Good luck to all!

P.S. - yeah, I know I was stretching it with the names.

Question Me, Will You?

I had to refill my Metrocard before getting on the subway tonight. As I used the automated vending machine a harried young woman started using the machine next to me. She was obviously in a rush.
She half asked, half barked at me "how much is a single ride?"  Had she selected the Buy A Single Ride option instead of the Buy A Metrocard option, the on-screen display would have told her it is $2.25. But she didn't so I told her the current rate.
Her voice raised even more, she says "are you sure, didn't it go up?"  A little annoyed at her tone, I said it was $2.25 this morning and I was pretty sure it hadn't changed since.
AGAIN she shouts "but didn't it go up?!?!?!"  Fighting the urge to tell her to go back to where she came from, I responded in an apologetic voice "you know what, you're right. I forgot that it went to $4.00 last weekend.
And I walked away with an admittedly smug sense of satisfaction as I saw her slip four singles into the machine.
Welcome to New York, sweetie.

King... of the A-Holes

Last Saturday, Mike and Buffe143 went to the Nets v Knicks game at Madison Square Garden.  At some point, Bernard King must have come up, either in an old highlight reel, in conversation with Mike or maybe even in person at the Garden.  Because on her site, Buffe143 wrote "Booooooooo Bernard King!!! Hate him!!"

For those that don't know, Bernard King is one of the NBA's great all time scorers and one of the best players of the 1980s.  To my knowledge, Bernard was not known to raise much controversy off the court like today's players.  But little did I know that King has an ego to match his name.

After questioning her hatred for King, Buffe143 - who works in the hospitality industry - gave a very politically correct answer.  She simply said there as an incident while checking him in a while back.  Some of Buffe143's old co-workers weren't quite as cryptic in the comments they added to the conversation.  Still days later people are adding their own Bernard King-in-the-hotel horror stories on topics including wife beating, the infamous "do you know who I am?!?!?" statement, fear of making room deliveries alone and even something about transvestite hookers.

Bernard King was never my favorite player, but I remember watching him in the mid-80s with the Knicks, and toward the end of his career with the Nets.  Never would I have guessed that he was such a jerk.  That was the most eye opening comment thread I've ever seen.

Breakfast Extravaganza

Today was a cooking extravaganza (at least by my standards).  It started last week when I had a hankerin' for for home fries.  This was a hankerin' time could not satiate so they carried over to today.  But searching the www reveals quite a controversy over the best way to prepare home fries.  For example, Rachel Ray says to do them in the oven, Emeril Lagasse says they should be parboiled, and Bobby Flay just throws them straight into a skillet.

So in light of all this debate, I turned to a Cook's Illustrated Cookbook that Melissa has.  The great thing about this book is that they try recipes a bunch of different ways and explain the pros and cons of each until they settle on the best.  We've cooked several things out of this and each of been very good.  They agree with Emeril, so I would parboil them first, then throw them in the skillet for finishing.

The home fries are a side dish.  For the main course Melissa wanted pancakes.  Like home fries, everyone has their own "the best pancakes ever" recipe.  Melissa wanted to try one that her parents have been making using whole wheat flour, oatmeal and oat bran (good thing the plumber confirmed the toilets are in working order early this week).

Pancakes are quick, but boiling potatoes is going to take some time, so I needed an appetizer.  We bought a pineapple earlier this week and I thought grilling them would be tasty.  I kind of combined a bunch of recipes from around the web and ended up slathering them with a 2-to-1 honey and lemon juice mix with a dash of hot sauce.  I put them on the George Foreman Grill rather than the real grill.  The lack of grill marks made them less attractive than I wanted, but no less tasty.  They would make a good dessert with some ice cream and angel food cake too.

Here's where the real cooking started.  I had four things to make at the same time: The potatoes, pancakes, a blueberry-lemon syrup and bacon.  Why bacon?  Why not bacon?!?!  It makes everything better.  Specifically it serves two purposes here: first, I needed some protein (no, I don't think that's a stretch.  Meat protein, right?).  Second, I was trying to think of a way to jazz up the potatoes a bit.  My solution was to substitute the bacon drippings for the potatoes recipe's canola oil.  Hhhhmmmm, bacon grease.

I was a little concerned about managing so many dishes.  To help, I jotted down some recipe notes on a piece of paper and taped it to the cabinet right in front of me.  It provided the measurements, key instructions and itinerary right there so I didn't have to leave my station.  As a result, I think it all went pretty good.  The only problem was the potatoes.  Despite all the testing at Cook's Illustrated kitchens, the potatoes weren't nearly ready when they should have been.  Melissa came to the rescue, telling me to add a little water to the skillet and cover it for a few minutes.  That saved the potatoes and allowed me to serve everything at the same time.

Melissa said it was my best breakfast yet.  With bacon and potatoes, how could it not be?  The final tally:

• Sweet and Spicy Grilled Pineapple - 4 stars
• Bacon Fried Home Fries* - 5 stars
• Plain and Simple Bacon - 4.5 stars (doing bacon in the oven takes a lot longer than the microwave, but its worth it)
• Oats and Bran Pancakes* - 5 stars
• Blueberry Citrus Syrup* - 4.5 starts

Was she being a little generous?  Who cares!  I'm taking what I can get.

A quick note about the rest of the weekend - I finished part one of the latest home repair project and will being working on the video.  

* These recipes are not available on the web.  To protect against copyright infringement, let me know if you'd like me to email you the recipes.

Another Home Improvement Video

Over a year ago, I posted the now infamous Door Repair trailer.  And still to this day not a discussion about ITWOP takes place without someone asking me what happened to the full feature.  Truth be told, I did work on it... a lot!  The problem was that the trailer was better than the full movie.  The entertainment value was in my screw ups and frustration (which the trailer showed), not in me finally getting the door repaired (which was basically the rest of the movie).  To improve the final product, I tried adding in a lot of cool editing.  But as I mentioned in the FAQs that followed, Windows Movie Maker is kind of clunky.  Now - fifteen months later - it remains unseen, perhaps to be uncovered after my death and hailed as my true masterpiece.

But until that time, I unwittingly began work on another home improvement video.  I'm going on record now to set expectations low rather than add to the posthumous treasure trove I'm building.  The only preview you're going to get is:

• I will be wet
• I will be dirty
• I will inevitably screw something up

And if I don't have at least the repair done by this weekend, I'll probably be sleeping on the couch.