Hot and Cold

Who knew the you can't pour hot melted butter into cold milk?  If the half-encouraging, half-wise ass text messages flying back and forth between Melissa and Brutus Buckeye are any indication, the answer is "everyone by Joe."

Yes, my Cinnamon Waffles with Caramelized Apples and Caramel Whipped Cream took a disastrous turn when I poured the butter I just melted in the microwave into the cold buttermilk.  Within two seconds of mixing I noticed what appeared to be ice crystals forming on the whisk.  When I ask Melissa what was going on, she knew right away that either the milk curdled or the butter separated.  And since that was the last of the buttermilk we had on hand, it was also the end of my homemade waffle batter recipe.

I turned to the Bisquick we had on hand from the pancake attempt a few weeks ago.  The apples and whipped cream turned out pretty darn good, and once the waffles cooked we certainly enjoyed the meal.  We can't score the waffle aspect of the recipe since we never got to try them, but the apple topping and the whipped cream each get four stars.

My sidedish was just plain disappointing.  I found an Apple and Maple Sausage recipe that I thought would go great with the waffles.  There may be been several points where I went wrong with this one:

• I used chicken instead of pork sausage (pork never leads you astray)
• I decided to add cherries
• I prepared the patties the night before
• I chopped the apples more finely than was probably intended

But no matter where it took the turn, the end result was awful.  I tried one out of the pan and decided not to even plate it.  I just threw out the entire batch.  Since I changed so much about the recipe, I can't really score it, but my version of the recipe gets zero stars.

I've made the decision that next week needs to be scaled back a little bit.  It has to be something that I have a proven ability to deliver, and I think I known just the thing.

Snow Through the Ages

Brutus Buckeye is already in the thick of the blizzard that has the potential to biggest snow total in the area's history.  You can follow his play-by-play on Twitter.  And it seems like it started here a few hours ago.  There hasn't been much accumulation yet, but the weathermen are predicting anywhere from 3 to 12".  This all got me thinking about how the anticipation of snow has changed for me over the year.

As a child, who doesn't dream of a snow day?  It meant an extra day off from school, snowmen, and hot chocolate.  I'll never forget how we'd have our feet wrapped with plastic grocery bags underneath our boots (how do the children of Whole Foods shoppers keep their feet dry?).

As a teenager, snow meant money.  My friends and I would roam the streets, shovels in hand and anxious to take advantage of people in need.  Digging out cars cost about $20 or $30 dollars, driveways and sidewalks cost way more.

Brutus's recent tweet sums up snow for an adults quite perfectly:

"Plenty of booze, snacks, TP, & DVDs. And I can work from home on Mon. if we're still iglooed. What else do you need?"

In other words, you spend days preparing and then days worrying about what its going to do to your work.

Man, seems a lot better to make snowmen.

Update: I just checked the weather report and they're now saying we'll get 1-3".

Like Himom Said

Last week I wasn't thrilled with my Sunday breakfast, but Himom reminded me its the thought that counts.  Amen to that, especially today!

I already know that I'm going more traditional next week, so I wanted to be a little decadent this morning and therefore planned a very sweet menu.  Both recipes could have actually be used as a desert or as breakfast/brunch.  To start, I caramelized some bananas and topped them with melted Nutella instead of ice cream.  I cooked the orange juice longer than the recipe suggests, and maybe should have done it even longer in order to concentrate the flavor more.   All in all, they were pretty good, and served as a nice, sweet started.  Melissa and I are giving then 3-and-a-half stars.

And that's where it started to go south.  When deciding to add a little international flair to the meal, I had no idea crepes were so friggin' difficult to cook.  I cut the recipe to make eight servings, and it's a good thing I did.  I was four crepes until I figured out the method.  My first attempt is pictured at left.

Figuring that food shouldn't got to waste, I tried the first disastrous crepe with the pear filling I prepared.  Umm, not so good.  The texture just didn't make any sense.  I threw the pears one a cookie sheet and tried roasting them, thinking it would soften them up and make it a little more breakfast-y.  The result was better than the uncooked pears, but it still wasn't very good.  For reasons that seem inexplicable now, I thought that serving them like a tacos instead of individual dishes might make them taste better.  What to guess if it made a difference?  No, of course it didn't.  I honestly can't see how this recipe would make a good breakfast or desert, even if it was made perfectly according to plan.  One star.  I should have known better than to trust a French dish.

So lessons learned today - Nutella makes everything delicious; know your limitations in the kitchen; food photography is hard, especially when you're taking pictures, cooking and eating all at the same time.

The Women of the World are Weeping

Those cries you hear this morning are all the young women, distraught over the fact that Mike is officially off the market.  That's right, TO has made an honest man of Mike during yesterday's wedding ceremony.

The momentous event was caught on video for all to enjoy (note the stylish attire) and is a prelude to the gala affair yet to come in a couple of months.

Please join Melissa and me in congratulating Mike and TO on the start of their union.  ITWOP Nation loves you both!

Barack-Handed Compliment

A year ago, I promised to sing about our President's successes aa loudly as I complained of his failures. I've certainly done enough of the latter, and hope that tonight I'll finally be able to do the former.

The early indication is that tonight's State of the Union address will bring Obama's administration back to a populist approach.  Supposedly he's going to reset his focus on things the country is clamoring for like job creation and off of things the don't need as much like fast-tracking healthcare.  Cheers to that!

But now you have to ask WHY he's doing this.  That answer is easy - the honeymoon is over.  Scott Brown's election in Massachusetts is just the latest signal that Americans are getting tired of all the lofty claims still unrealized and the migration to the extreme left.  Basically he's doing it in preparation for the 2010 and 2012 elections.

So I applaud that it seems he will finally be a representative of his countrymen, doing what THEY want rather than what HE wants.  But at the same time I have to ask why its taken so long.  Better yet, why has it taken a weakening of his party to do it?  Political officials are elected to enact the will of their people.  Our primary mission was clear from jump street - get us working again. Yet its only now that his poll numbers are dropping and his party is losing seats that he's doing it.  Polls have shown for months that the citizens don't agree with his healthcare plan, but only now is he changing.

Whatever the reason is, the change is correct.  If tonight follows the predictions, tomorrow I'll be congratulation Obama's.  If not?  Well...

Trial and Error

My family is full of great cooks on both sides.  Because I could always rely on them I've never had to learn much about cooking myself.  But although today is only the third Surprise Sunday Sunrise Sustenance I'm already learning a lot. Today I decided to make whole grain pancakes with wild blueberry-maple syrup and grilled cinnamon bruschetta with strawberries and mascarpone.  During the process, I learned three valuable lessons that my family knows by heart:

1) Menu planning requires thought.  I wanted to focus on fruit this week, which is why I  chose what I chose.  It wasn't until this morning that I realized this menu is all fruit and carbs, no protein.  Not the end of the world, obviously.  But still it's going to be difficult to fit eggs or breakfast meat into every meal without it being the centerpiece.  I should have learned this from Melissa, who painstakingly plans out the entire week's meals every Saturday and Sunday.

2) Read the recipes.  Unbeknown to me, the pancake recipe assumed that the mix you're using included eggs.  The recipe on the Bisquick box (the mix I was using) told you to add eggs.  Had I looked at the Bisquick recipe, I wouldn't have wasted a third of my batter on pancakes that never cooked. I should have learned this from FIL.  Though he might make some changes during the process, he always reads all the directions (twice) before starting.

3) Have a appetizer on hand.  I know, appetizers aren't usually associated with breakfast.  And I wasn't planning the bruschetta to be an appetizer.  But when my first batch of pancakes failed and the second took longer than expected to cook, it turned into an appetizer.  Melissa would have probably moved on to microwaved oatmeal if I didn't have something to tide her over.  I should have learned this from HIMOM who serves more appetizers than there's room on the table.

At the end of it, the bruschetta was excellent!  It's not the healthiest thing ever, but we're still giving it five stars for the subtle combination of flavors.  The pancakes get three stars.  The blueberry-maple syrup was good, but the pancakes were nothing special.

Have a better pancake recipe?  Advice for menu planning?  A spare copy of Hooked on Phonics to help me read the instructions?  Let me know!

Bats in the Belfry

A few weeks ago, we started hearing a tapping on our bedroom wall at night. I assumed it was a tree branch scraping the side of the house or a leaf stuck in the shingles and blowing on the wind. So I cleaned up any debris I saw and thought it would go away. Unfortunately it hasn't - and it so bad last night that Melissa moved into the guest room!

If there's nothing outside, it must be inside.  Fearing that could be bugs we called an exterminator today.  Melissa led him through the house and attic, and he didn't find anything.  That's good, right?  Maybe not.

He's 99% confident that its not bugs, mice or rats (thank Christ, I would have moved immediately if it were rats).  But he does think its either squirrels, birds or bats.  There's another woodpecker hole (http://www.ithinkweoverpacked.com/2009/07/weekend-honey-do-list.html) that I didn't see and therefore didn't patch.  That's where they'd be getting in.  And he didn't see any sign of a nest, so they haven't set up camp yet.  Yet! They're just coming and going at night.

Now, how do I get them out?  I could:
a) plug the hole. But if they're still inside they'd be stuck and either die and rot, try to dig another hole or try to get into the first floor.
b) sit in the attic all night and kill them when they show up.  That's neither humane nor reasonable.
c) get a one-way door that lets them out but not in.

Option C is really my only option. I'm going to stop at Home Depot tonight and pick one up. Will I get to install it tonight?  Probably not. Unless its a bat it will probably be indoors at night. I don't want to be up on a ladder when it shoots out the hole because of my hammering.  So odds are we'll have this thing in the house at least until the weekend.

Man, this sucks!